Has deleted release dates from the CarPlay page

Fruity cargo cult Apple is having trouble getting products out of its flying saucer—this time, its CarPlay "product has been placed on the never-never list.

Insists they are safe

The fruity cargo cult Apple has denied that its watch bands are unsafe, even if they are laced with forever chemicals and the outfit is being sued over their toxic content.

Will pay Apple's charges for developers 

Epic Games is set to add nearly 20 third-party games to its app store, igniting excitement on Android devices globally and on iOS within the European Union.

Playing monoply with their app stores

Britain’s competition watchdog has Apple and Google in its sights once again, launching fresh investigations into the tech giants’ mobile ecosystems under powerful new rules designed to curb digital market abuses.

You can’t really depend on a single product

The fruity cargo cult Apple is starting to see its single-product cash cow business model begin to fall apart.

Half baked

Red-faced cargo cult Apple has pulled its AI news product after it was universally declared as accurate as a Russian government announcement about the Ukrainian war.  

Up to 300 per cent

British chip technology supplier Arm wants to jack up tits royalty rates by up to 300 per cent and develop its own chips in a move that could place it in direct competition with its largest customers.

Turns out you can’t fool them

The fruity cargo cult Apple is in hot water again with the EU regulators after its much-hyped plan to liberalise its app store fees has turned out to cost developers more.

Fruity cargo cult has not done anything new for ages

Meta CEO Mark Zuckerberg shocked the Tame Apple press by committing public heresy.

We still did nothing wrong, it was broke when we got there

The fruity cargo cult Apple has taken the rare step of speaking to the media after paying out millions of dollars to settle a privacy lawsuit.