Its official, Apple’s Vision Pro is a turkey
Could not even sell 100,000
It arrived over-hyped and obscenely overpriced, yet the fruity cargo cult Apple was convinced its users were stupid enough to buy it. However, it turns out that not even Apple fanboys were that dumb to splash out on the Vision Pro.
Apple’s expensive Vision Pro is cracking up
Jobs’ mob rubs paws at prospect of making money repairing it
Apple Vision Pro owners are posting identical reports of a crack appearing on the front glass of their overpriced headsets.
Apple moves Vision Pro team to sort out foldable flop
Failure meets vapourware in custard's last stand
Fruity cargo cult Apple is so proud of its Vision Pro team, which made an expensive product which is being returned, it has shifted them to sorting out its foldable phone flop mess.
Zuck slams Apple's pricey face gadget
The emperor has no clothes
Apple's Vision Pro is getting a lot of stick now that it can be stuck to faces and now Meta boss Mark Zuckerberg has joined in.
Apple's Vision Pro is a plastic turkey
Plastic scratches easily and passwords require Apple store visit
The Apple Vision Pro is a bulky bit of mixed-reality kit, and that's because most of us thought it was made of posh materials like glass and aluminium.
Tame Apple Press starting to admit that the Vision Pro is pants
Not ready to be released
After Jobs Mob lifted the embargo on the first wave of “non-curated reviews” of its Vision Pro headset the Tame Apple Press is being forced to admit publically that the gear is not ready for release.
Netflix says no thanks to $3,500 Apple specs that nobody wants
Apple’s Vision Pro VR headset is a waste of everyone’s cash
Netflix is everywhere. It's on your phone, computer, and game console, even on the old Nintendo Wii, but it will not be on Apple's pricey Vision Pro VR headset.
Apple’s over-priced largely useless Vision Pro is selling
The standards of the world have slipped even lower
Apple flogs 180,000 Vision Pro headsets to gullible fans who don't mind paying $3,499 for a largely useless glorified toy.
Apple's bizarre AR and VR rules
Don’t call them Vision Pro apps
Fruity cargo cult Apple is trying to slap some daft rules on those who want to release apps for its overpriced Vision Pro’s visionOS.
Zuckerberg says “meh” to Apple’s Vision Pro
Out-of-date, over-priced and nothing we have not already explored
Desperate to find a way to advertise Apple’s pointless VR specs, the Tame Apple Press has asked Mark Zuckerberg what he thinks of the technology and if he is ready to surrender his metaverse dreams to his superior Jobs’ Mob overlords.