Tanking shipments fall by 40.5 per cent

Fruity cargo cult Apple saw its PC sales fall faster than a team of free-fall parachuting elephants who have forgotten to pack the key component of their act.

Fortunately, Microsoft saved Apple’s security bacon

A cyber mercenary outfit QuaDream was using holes in iPhone security to allow governments to spy on journalists and political opposition figures for repressive regimes.

This time it may not surrender

France's anti-trust watchdog, the French Competition Authority, is likely to move forward soon with an antitrust investigation into Apple over complaints tied to 2021 changes to its app tracking policies.

iPhones worth more than a bank vault

In a move normally reserved for thieves wanting to break into bank vaults, robbers tunnelled their way into an Apple backstore to steal $500,000 worth of iPhones (that is probably about six).

We doubt anyone will notice

iPhone owners who have been saving money by using older phones and not updating their iOS are going to have a nasty surprise later this year.

Texas man fears he could be shot any day

 A Texas man has begged Apple to pull finger and fix a glitch in their 'Find My iPhone' app before a patriotic fellow American uses their constitutional rights to execute him for stealing their expensive gear.

Better things to do

A new survey from Piper Sandler shows that US teens find Virtual Reality silly.

No one wants Macbooks

Fruity cargo cult Apple has been forced to suspend the production of its super-hyped M2 systems on a chip because no one wants to buy the Macbook for which it was designed.

Even if his company’s forthcoming project more doomed than the Titanic

Apple supremo Tim Cook is trying to encourage positive stories about his outfit’s AR and VR gear before its launch on 5 June.

In Texas of course

An Apple fanboy who tagged his “truck” with an AirTag used the device to track down a car thief and execute him.